still raining

Hi,
I keep waiting to hear God, in a loud Charleston Heston voice, say
"Marilyn, build an ark. You're going to need it... and don't forget the unicorns this time."

Yes, it is still raining outside. It's not very windy but it seems to be moving the trees to and fro so it isn't calm out either. Our house is dry which is a huge relief. We did have a major roof problem a week ago but our roofer rescued us and is planning to get all the damages taken care of. The ridge vents near the back, where we have a flat roofing section, were taking in water and it ended up creating Niagara Falls in our foyer. Not pretty. The water ruined a door frame and our hardwood floors. The ridge vent has since been covered up where it meets the flat roof and Christopher is sending in his flooring repair man next week to assess the damages. I'm trying to stay clam about having the floor fixed. I'm praying that the section can be removed and replaced and stained to match (which I think it can if he's a really great flooring guy). Other wise it could mean having to have the whole first floor redone and I'm not thinking about that option.... concentrate on positive thoughts and cross fingers for us.

This whole issue is a joke compared to the people who have to evacuate by the Delaware. We have friends who have been flooded out 3 times in the last 8 years and are planning to move out to stay with neighbours on higher ground today. They have finally had enough of this and plan to sell their house ASAP...  as soon as it stops raining and the waters recede. Everything gets cancelled here when it rains hard. The roads flood at a moments notice, poor drainage systems or none at all in most places. Driving in anything smaller than a safari Range Rover is tricky. My Honda knows it's limits and stays in the garage for flood weather.

Yesterday I rode my bike down to my favorite market to get some fresh fish, yummy cherries, a bread and 2 heads of lettuce. I had 3 people ask how I was going to get all my necessary provisions home. They were stocking up for Armageddon. Who ever needs 40 lbs. of potatoes in one shot? How about 6 cases of Coca-cola, now there is a life saving necessity. It was wild in the market shop, people were in a frenzy to get enough food to last them for the rest of their life, at least that is what it looked like to me. I peddled away with my back pannier full of my treasures.  Let them eat potatoes.

xox
m

Captain Nemo

Hi,
it isn't what you're thinking. I'm not going to write a review of Jules Verne's, "Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea (1870)"... although it is a classic for good reason. I'm talking about teaching little kids to swim. Captain Nemo is my alias in the pool, among others. I also get called "Miss Marilyn", "Queen of the Pool" and "Swimming Diva" to name a few. Depending on my mood or the age of my student.


I only teach private lesson. One-on-one works best for me and the kids. I do have an adult 'learn to swim class' on Fridays but that's a different topic. When I'm teaching little children it's face-to-face. They trust me when they have my full attention and I can get them to push their personal boundaries farther than even they could imagine. They get their faces wet, head under the water, jump off the edge of the pool, look for treats at the bottom and play crocodile all because they have me right beside them, in their face and promising eternal support for as long as they are in the water with me.


Today I had new students, 3 year old twins, cute, cute, cute. In 40 minutes we went from crying and refusing to get wet, to loving swimming and looking forward to next weeks lesson. "I'm not wearing goggles" turned into a fashion statement that they both kids insisted on making. Riding a styrofoam noodle named "Max" brought giggles. Taking Mr & Mrs. Rubber Duckie for a dip was the best game of fetch ever played. Can you pretend to be an alligator and blow bubbles while walking on your hands in the shallow part of the ramp? You bet if it's fair game to chomp, chomp, chomp up the ramp and flutter kick till your legs give out. Yeah swimming!


You can't start them too young in my opinion and today I won over two new converts to the love of everything water & wet. Captain Nemo strikes again.


xox
m

Are you buying Gold?

Hi,
well, are you? The gold market fascinates me and my dad. He phones me regularly from Toronto to make sure I'm up on the latest price high. I inherited his obsession. I don't sit and watch it on CNN or Bloomberg like he does. I haven't the inclination to watch grass grow either, but golds' growth in price sure is interesting.

Why gold you ask? Why not. Nothing else is offering the same kind of return these days and the way the US dollar is sinking I'd rather have something that is not only holding its value but rising at an amazing speed. I can hardly keep up. Five years ago a few annalists were predicting gold would hit $2000 an ounce. At that time it was reaching $600, up from the $350 it had been languishing at for a decade or so. I thought they were a little crazy but I could see it hitting $1000/ounce, maybe. Should have, would have, could have.... ain't it always the way. We did buy some then, in hind sight I wish we'd bought a whole lot more. 

We have continued to purchase gold for the last 7 years and I am glad we did. It's hitting that $2000 mark and looking like the sky is the limit. We all know that there is a 'limit' to what it will rise to but the trick is knowing what to do with it when it plateaus out or starts to readjust in a downward fashion. ... and it will. It always does. Everything does.

I just happy I didn't buy into the first 'dot-com' useless paper IPO in 2008, nor am I buying in now. Google, Zynga, Facebook, MySpace.... they are 'air', they make nothing and produce nothing of true value. Here today, probably gone tomorrow. The consumer is so fickle it is difficult to predict what will happen to any of these companies. Google is trying to buy Motorolas' phone business. We'll see if that is finally allowed... can you say 'monopoly'? I don't think certain industries are anything but monopolies, we just don't notice them as much. My point is that I'd rather have the security of gold, an international measure of wealth, than Google shares right now.

I may not have the Midas touch or find that goose who lays golden eggs, but I know where to find our stash in a flash.

xox
m

free-dumb

hi,
I would like to know how some people get through life. As my friend Beth says "common sense is not so common any more". Daily I run into human beings making bad choices and then wondering why things are going well for them. Leave your keys in the car, and be shocked when someone stole it. Forget your spouses birthday, and not know why they are pissed at you. Bail out a business bleeding money, then question why things haven't turned around yet. Let us look closer at that last example.

Here I am (not really ME, but the theoretical "me"). My business is failing, I'm in debt to my eyeballs, I've run a company into the ground and have a hole 100' deep to try and climb my way out of. Logically I should just bury the poor dead thing and walk away. Throwing good money after bad has never worked out for anything. Why hasn't the U.S. government paid attention to this idea? Why are they all so hell bent on throwing more money at something that is so broken and sick it needs to die. No one wants a full blown recession. Why not? It's what is needed to get back on track. We could rise from the ashes like the Phoenix and be stronger for. Instead the fat cats get a bail out, pat themselves on the back for conning the government into saving their sorry asses and then to add insult to injury, they take the money and dole out excessive bonuses to themselves and all their buddies on the board who voted for them... and the circle goes round & round. It makes me sick.

Has anything been saved? Not one darn thing in my opinion. The markets continue to plummet. The dollar is dropping like a stone. Investors are heading to the hills. The U.S.A. is in a very sick state yet the IPO "dot-com" idiots are trying to tell us that the internet is worth billions and we should throw more money at the air, just like we did in 2008. History repeats itself when we don't pay attention to the first go-round.

The only thing that lets me sleep at night is the fact that Marshall & I owe nothing. Everything we have is paid for, ours in full, no debt, not one cent. If the value of the house, or the cars, or the stocks move up or down it doesn't matter, no one can come calling to repossess any of it. I don't know how people can live in a situation when, technically, the bank owns it all through loans and mortgages. The bank doesn't even want any of our stuff either, they are loaded down with their own losses. Self inflicted wounds abound and everyone was at fault. The greed took over and the common sense, which is not so common according to Beth, completely left the room.

There is no such thing as a free lunch, just free-dumb.

xox
m

back to white

Hi,
my adventure yesterday involved the dentist. I'm not a fan of the dentist. I like them, they are mostly very nice people, I just hate having anyone work in my mouth. It always hurts. I am blessed with my fathers good teeth and my mother beat proper dental hygiene into us at a young age. I haven't had a cavity in over 40 years, no root canals, not even a smidgen of gum disease and not a real need for braces (although my Aunt Gilda always commented on my over bite needing correcting, I've been able to live with it).

My teeth have changed through no fault of my own. Chemotherapy made them turn a dingy brown. I have had a front tooth that is discoloured since I was 5 (Richard Caplan pushed in on the playground ice and I fell, killing the tooth, I have yet to forgive him) but I didn't really care about it since it stayed in my mouth and never caused me any grief. The tint of my smile was looking unhealthy, and having a sad looking smile seemed liked a stupid oxymoron. I've been watching the movie stars and TV celebs get whiter and brighter teeth in the last few years, to the point where they practically glow they are so luminous, I figured I didn't have to go that white but they could be improved upon. I bought in.

Our dentist here offers a 'Zoom' system for whitening. I did what ever biased research you can on the internet about the system and  talked to her about the process. I also polled a few friends and stopped strangers on the street. David Letterman made a living asking people on the street stupid questions so why can't I? Okay, I didn't stop strangers but I did ask around. Seemed like I was the only person over 12 years old who hadn't had something done to their teeth. Time to get teeth-savvy beyond the tooth fairy. I dove right in.

I pent two hours in the dental chair yesterday with my mouth wrapped around a gizmo to hold my lips & tongue out of the way, cotton batten stuffed in every oral crevice visible and  then they start asking you questions... you know how this goes. Ugly. The dental technician painted a special bleach on my teeth then pointed a UV light into my mouth for 15 minutes while I was trapped listening to Regis & Kelly banter about drivel and giggle. Torturous. Not the procedure, the TV crap!

Once it was all over, and they repeat the bleach & light exposure 4 times so it takes about 1½ hours of sitting there while you go from Regis & Kelly to re-runs of The View, also painful. Not the whitening, the TV. After it was said and done I got teeth back that were almost 4 shades whiter than when I had started. I'm pleased with the results and the sensitivity of my teeth has returned to almost normal this morning. Next I am going to have the front 'dark' tooth have a veneer put over it and call it good. This was my "vanity over 50" move. Cheaper than a face lift or tummy tuck and less invasive than hair implants.

Worth every minute of Kelly Rippa hee-hawing.

xox
m

I've don't even have a parking ticket

Hi,
I'm tired of being detained.

Every time, and I do mean EVERY time, I cross back into the U.S.A. I am detained at Customs by Homeland Security. I get off a plane, line up, show my valid Canadian passport and Permanent Resident Card for the U.S.A. and then the fun starts. The officials smile at me, ask me to place my right 4 fingers on the security pad, then my right thumb, then my left 4 fingers, then my left thumb, then they take my photo... then they shake their head, frown and proceed to collect all my documents and march me to "the room".

"The room" varies from airport to airport but they are all pretty similar. They consist of as many as a dozen Homeland Security officials with full regalia on (back uniforms, badges of authorization, patrol batons, guns and bad haircuts), a counter too high for anyone to see over, several computer screens that only the officials can stare at, about 40-50 uncomfortable chairs, access to a bathroom and dull grey walls. I have been kept in "the room" for as long as 4 hours, waiting for it to be my turn.

While you sit, and all you can do is sit, you get to watch the Homeland Security team do their thing. They round up the little old ladies from India in wheelchairs. Young back packers from Germany. Businessmen from Taiwan. Mothers with screaming children. Fathers who speak little English. It's quite the motley crew once we are all assembled. No phone calls are allowed, don't even think about turning your cell phone on, let alone look at it to play Tetris (okay I'm dating myself). You just get to sit.

Once my name is finally called all I get is a "welcome back to the United Sates  Ms. Naiman", my documents handed back to me and a wave to the exit door. No explanation, no apology, no nothing, not even a stale cookie. I'm thinking the least they could do is hand out cookies and tea while you wait. I have tried asking what it is about me that gets me put in 'the room' every time but the most I get is a reference to the fact that I was sent back from crossing in Windsor to Detroit in 2006 (a whole other story). Okay, but they let me cross into the States the following day and Marshall had to marry me to keep that from happening again, so what's the problem now? We pay our taxes, I don't have a criminal record, the house is clean and I buy Girl Scout cookies. What is the matter with me?

My new attempt to clear this up is filing with T.R.I.P (Traveler Redress Identity Program), bet you didn't even know they had one of these, did you? June 13th I put in for a "redress I.D." which means they are supposed to get my name off what ever list it is on with Homeland Security so that I can show my I.D. and get through security like everyone else. I still haven't heard back from anyone at TRIP. Yesterday I spent 2 hours e-mailing senators, governors and congressmen to get them to see what's holding up the process.... all of them e-mailed me back that there is nothing they can do about a Homeland Security problem. It's out of their hands..... is this starting to sound like an "SS" World War ll scenario? "I  hear notink, I see nothink, I know nothink!". So I wait.

I have to say my most recent trip to 'the room' lasted only 15 minutes and they actually let Marshall sit with me this time..... but it's still the biggest waste of time, effort and money to stop ME. How terrifying is a short middle-aged Jewish broad with a shaved head and knitting needles? 

Obviously I scare the crap out of them.

xox
m

uch gross!

Hi,
it wasn't a matter of if, more an issues of when, but it was inevitable that I was going to take a dip in our pond sooner or later. Tonight 'sooner' happened. Oh Gross!

I decided that since it finally stopped pouring cats and dogs that I would tackle the weekly cleaning of the pond. It is a job and chore that I truly dislike. You have to scrub the sides & bottom of the pit with a long handled bristle brush then scoop out the algae and crud that is stirred up off the bottom. The fish love it because they get to play tag with the scrub brush and scoop net. I think it's a baits' version of the game "Marco Polo" and if you don't know what that means you haven't had to hang around the swimming pools in any resort listening to the kids all scream "Marco"  "Polo" for hours on end... it's why good strong martinis were designed... back to my bedtime story for tonight.

Some how one of the large stones from the perimeter of the pond had slipped into the middle of the water and I was using the long handled scrub brush to maneuver it  to where it was shallowest, planning to reach in and pull it out. The handle on the brush was less robust than I thought and as I was using it as leverage to move the stone, it bent in half, I slipped on the wet rocks (from all the rain, note above reference) and the next thing I know I'm looking up at the sky from the bottom of the lagoon. BLECH!

This is totally disgusting on so many levels. First I had been churning up all the crud by moving the stone around. Second, I hadn't started cleaning anything so it was slimy, oooooouuuuu. Third, the fish were looking at me like "this is our pond, bug off!". Lastly, it's just not fun falling into a fish pond with all your clothes, glasses, shoes, watch and jewelry on. The only redeeming note was  that there was no audience, but I thought the move could have at least rated a 4.2 from the Belgium judge for a quick recovery.

The rock is out. The pond is cleaner. The brush will have to be replaced. The fish wondered what the hell happened. I hope I didn't swallow any of that water.... revolting.

xox
m

we're on our way home

Hi,
It's Saturday morning in Aarhus and we're about to start the trek home. Unfortunately neighter of us slep all night but maybe we'll crash on the flight. I hope we don't get stuck with any screaming children near us, they usually sit right behind me, every time.

Aarhus was nice. It's not very warm here, highs of only 70 degrees during the day and sort of over cast. Summer in Denmark is fleeting and far from what I'm used to. Back to PA and the 90 degree weather. What a flip. People were very friendly in this town. I spent the days meandering around enjoying the clean streets and funky shops. Everything is very, very expensive so I just looked and gasped at the prices. Minimum wage here is over $20/hour but even then it's a fortune for everything. I don't know how they live here but the street are teaming with people and the restaurants are all pretty full... the economy is very healthy, unlike at home in the USA. We've been watching the market fall to pieces and the ratings drop through the floor. Europeans are shaking their heads at what's going on across the pond. It's not a pretty sight at all.

Time to boogie and start home. Future updates to follow once I'm back on American soil... for sale at half price this week, probably for 'free' soon

xox
m

the cost of Danish

hi,
day #2 and I'm having fun in Denmark. I walked over to the city swimming pool facility this morning. Everything is a 15 minute walk in this town, it's cute. I got a job offer right away. Seems everyone around the world is in need of swimming instructors. They didn't even care that I can't speak Danish. They were ready to hire me on the spot just for walking in and asking if they needed instructors. I'm set if we ever decide to live here. Minimum wage is $20/hour, nice! To put it in perspective, a dozen eggs cost $4, tomatoes are $5/lb and rib eye steak was $16/lb at the local grocery.... $20 doesn't go very far. A 1000sq.ft. apartment rents for $2500/month, gas is $10/gal and a beer is $6... okay the beer is pretty cheap but they MAKE it here (it's really good beer too).

Food. Food is my favorite thing about travelling around the world with Marshall. The hotel breakfast was awesome. Fresh eggs done any way you like, an assortment of muesilli cereals you'd never find at home, the bread is to die for, cheese... well I could stay and live on the fabulous cheese, organic yogourt, dried fruits, and my favorite herring! Don't say yuch at herring, it's not like the stuff they try to pawn off as herring in the USA. It's the real deal here. First, it's fresh. Second, it's not salty or vinegary. Third, it's the best herring I've ever tasted. Danish herring on rye bread is a diet I could live on eternally. We are going to a typical Danish restaurant for dinner (we didn't eat dinner last night since we had such a big late lunch and our body clocks were still in limbo). More on food later.

The art gallery was were I spent most of the day. I need a whole blog just to talk about what is here but it was a terrific gallery. I will get pictures out once we come home. My favorite things were the 'atmosphereic colour atlas' by Olafur Eliasson and the 'big boy' sculpture by Muesk. Google these and you'll see what I mean.

Time to dine. More to follow on our adventure in Aarhus (sometimes spelled Arhus, I haven't found out why there are 2 spellings, yet)

xox
m

Aarhus, Denmark

Hi,
we are in the land of windmills, smoked salmon and Danish. So far I think it's a great place to visit. Our flight was realitively easy. Newark to Amsterdam, Amsterdam, Billund Denmark. The taxi that was supposed to meet us in Billund didn't show up but a few phone calls later we had a car & driver getting us to Aarhus (about an hour's drive from the airport).

Aarhus is very quaint. Cobbled streets, low rise buildings, street sculpture and gelatto shops on every corner. They can afford to eat gelatto every block because everyone walks & cycles here to get anywhere,.Once we got settled we spent the afternoon wandering. It's a very small town and in just a few hours we were able to walk a good part of downtown. We ate at an outdoor cafe and had the best smoked salmon sandwich in the world. Fresh dark pumpernickle bread with a pile of dark greens & avocado topped with the yummiest salmon on top of it all. I'd stay just for the lox ("laks" in Danish... leave it to me to make my first word in Danish food of some sort).

Tomorrow I plan to roam the art gallery next door to our hotel, the 'old village' where they have moved a bunch of 14th & 15th century homes & buildings into an area to celebrate Danish history. I also hope to go to the royal grounds and check out the Queens gardens. She's out of town right now so the grounds are open to the public.... my royal invitation must have got lost in the mail. This place is really pretty. We ended up talking to this family in the park for over an hour this afternoon. He was Australian, she's from Aarhus, they have 2 little boys 2 &4 years old and his mom was visiting from Brisbane. We had a fun time talking to them about living here: taxes, the cost of living, politics, the great outdoor spaces, local gossip.... it's so interesting talking to locals and ex-pats about a place. It gives you insight and a true perspective. All useful info. The dad turned out to be an engineer so he & Marshall had a great time... his wife shouted "nerd allert" when they realized they were both engineers. It was a terrific chance meeting.

Everyone speaks excellent English, I feel stupid not being able to speak any Danish but no one seems to care. I will have to get brave and test out my bad pronunciation of things on menues or maps. The worst they could do is laugh. Danish is not easy to follow and of course they all speak it at warp speed. Signage is all in Danish but I'm able to follow the map with no problems. Shops and restaurants are all easy to get help in English, menues are mostly in Danish but have photos of the food.... I'm not going to starve at all.

Time to crash, tomorrow more from across the pond
xox
m